"I think we both know... that it isn't your mind that needs fixing."
And for a moment her hand comes up and just sits on his other arm. She holds there then guides him to her destination which happens to be a very big dumpster on the other side of the motel building. After a pause she relinquishes over a few contents of the newspaper. She keeps the needles (she was a doctor and knew better than to leave used needles about...also she would be keeping this half for her own level of disposal later), but hands him the packets and the elastic.
"Toss it in, please." She adds at the end for a reason she can't fathom. Her hand stays on his arm. "I'm.. I'm not going to be like that for you, Sherlock. I just want you to know. I don't want to find you like this again. I won't--"
And that was partly her job speaking and partly Joan. Which is probably why she says this even though she knows she shouldn't. She needed to stay detached, but it was far too late for that right now. "I won't push so hard next time. Leave it here. Leave all of it here and we'll go back and you'll try again."
She wasn't going to let him give up, no matter how disappointed or hopeless either one of them felt. Joan fixed people everyday of her life and those people had been just as wounded, just as broken in their bodies...and she knew it wasn't comparable and that to heal in the way he needed he had to want it. But Joan believed somewhere he did and that was enough. That was the first step.
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Date: 2012-12-07 10:50 pm (UTC)And for a moment her hand comes up and just sits on his other arm. She holds there then guides him to her destination which happens to be a very big dumpster on the other side of the motel building. After a pause she relinquishes over a few contents of the newspaper. She keeps the needles (she was a doctor and knew better than to leave used needles about...also she would be keeping this half for her own level of disposal later), but hands him the packets and the elastic.
"Toss it in, please." She adds at the end for a reason she can't fathom. Her hand stays on his arm.
"I'm.. I'm not going to be like that for you, Sherlock. I just want you to know. I don't want to find you like this again. I won't--"
And that was partly her job speaking and partly Joan. Which is probably why she says this even though she knows she shouldn't. She needed to stay detached, but it was far too late for that right now.
"I won't push so hard next time. Leave it here. Leave all of it here and we'll go back and you'll try again."
She wasn't going to let him give up, no matter how disappointed or hopeless either one of them felt. Joan fixed people everyday of her life and those people had been just as wounded, just as broken in their bodies...and she knew it wasn't comparable and that to heal in the way he needed he had to want it. But Joan believed somewhere he did and that was enough. That was the first step.